The Great Mental Belly Flop

thatbluebox:

kirkwoodisinoregon:

theadventuresofcargline:

#a day in the life of loki laufeyson #7:00 slap bitches with my pimp cane #7:30 replace thor’s shampoo with glue #8:00 go shopping for pudding #9:00 fill hiddleston’s current place of residence with copious amounts of said pudding #10:00 blow shit up #11:00 blow shit up #12:00 destroy everything #1:00 lunch time! #2:00 resume bitchslapping

3:00 hair feathering appointment 3:30 lattes with black widow 4:30 cry 4:31 level a small village a day in the life of loki laufeyson

#5:02 convince Hawkeye he is in fact a hawk #5:45 stare soulfully into the void #6:17 suit up #6:19 resume bitchslapping #7:00 dinner date with magneto to discuss brotherly and not-so-brotherly bonds and swap world domination tips #7:30 challenge the bar to a drinking contest #7:45 burn that bar the fuck down #8:00 remember why Thor banned you from midgardian liquor #8:30 drunk dial SHIELD #9:00 bitchslap those bitches when they try to put you to bed #9:10 pretend to pass out #9:39 sneak out #9:40 pause in escape to dip Thor’s hand in warm water and scribble marker all over Tony’s face #9:45 TEQUILA SHOTS YOLO

#10:00 head over Natasha’s for slumber party #10:15 braid hair and paint nails with hammers and hawks while talking about boys #10:30 watch Orphan#12:33 cry into Natasha’s beautifully braided hair about how you’re adopted #1:00 have Natasha read fanfic outloud to you to as a bedtime story #2:00 sleep #7:00 wake up and do it all again because pimpin ain’t easy when you’re Loki Laufeyson

kirkwoodisinoregon:

theadventuresofcargline:

#a day in the life of loki laufeyson #7:00 slap bitches with my pimp cane #7:30 replace thor’s shampoo with glue #8:00 go shopping for pudding #9:00 fill hiddleston’s current place of residence with copious amounts of said pudding #10:00 blow shit up #11:00 blow shit up #12:00 destroy everything #1:00 lunch time! #2:00 resume bitchslapping

3:00 hair feathering appointment 3:30 lattes with black widow 4:30 cry 4:31 level a small village a day in the life of loki laufeyson

#5:02 convince Hawkeye he is in fact a hawk #5:45 stare soulfully into the void #6:17 suit up #6:19 resume bitchslapping #7:00 dinner date with magneto to discuss brotherly and not-so-brotherly bonds and swap world domination tips #7:30 challenge the bar to a drinking contest #7:45 burn that bar the fuck down #8:00 remember why Thor banned you from midgardian liquor #8:30 drunk dial SHIELD #9:00 bitchslap those bitches when they try to put you to bed #9:10 pretend to pass out #9:39 sneak out #9:40 pause in escape to dip Thor’s hand in warm water and scribble marker all over Tony’s face #9:45 TEQUILA SHOTS YOLO

#10:00 head over Natasha’s for slumber party #10:15 braid hair and paint nails with hammers and hawks while talking about boys #10:30 watch Orphan#12:33 cry into Natasha’s beautifully braided hair about how you’re adopted #1:00 have Natasha read fanfic outloud to you to as a bedtime story #2:00 sleep #7:00 wake up and do it all again because pimpin ain’t easy when you’re Loki Laufeyson